My Mind Senior Year

In the midst of my senior year of high school, I’ve learned that senior year is a stressful one. Personally, I used to believe that Senior Year was supposed to be the breeze. Junior year was said to be the hardest, and I made it through that one (barely). With so much pressure on your shoulders, it’s hard to feel the breeze that is supposedly blowing my way. While it is a very cool year indeed, all I really feel is the slick slopes of ice on the roads and the harsh coldness emitting from the winter. For some reason, I thought the breeze would be much more pleasant.

My high school has went through great lengths to prepare me and my fellow seniors for the next few years, and, in my opinion, it has been quite successful in doing so. We’ve got the knowledge to make it through freshman year at least, and our survival techniques have grown by far (we know how to shower daily now) With that said and done, here are the things seniors are really thinking about right now aside from grades, college applications, financial aid, or anything around that matter:

1. Food –

…a thought that occupies our teenage minds probably every five minutes or so and is supplied daily through mom or dad’s great cooking (or in my case, my restaurant’s). How does one freshman college student obtain nutrition when one’s parents are far far away? This is pretty much mind-blowing to some of us; the fact that we, ourselves, have the ability to cook…that we will actually have to. And, then, the worst part…if we don’t cook for ourselves, we only have two options left: to pay for fattening and greasy fast food (with our own money, mind you) or to starve. At this point, we’re looking at gaining a lottt of weight or starving to death. This is just not okay.

2. Graduation –

We’re only looking past it right now because we have to. What’s really on our mind is the end, not the beginning. Our day to shine is sooo close, but still so so far. My count is 79 school days left, and I am ready for them to fly by (at least I think I am). We’re iffy about the “starting our lives” part afterwards, but my goodness, we can’t wait to get high school over with. I’ve heard that we will regret this feeling in the future…but I haven’t thought otherwise quite yet. I think I may feel it around day 10 left…maybe.

3. What am I gonna do about my relationship? –

Typing this one makes me feel silly, but I can’t say it hasn’t crossed my mind or anyone else’s…several times. Now, I must assure you that, in no way, has my relationship taken a serious role in choosing where I want to go or what I want to do next year. I am very particular in making sure that what I want is 100% what I want, and Eric seems to support that matter (thankful for this guy!).

This topic does not only pertain to those “high school sweethearts,” but those “high school friends” as well. I, personally, have no idea how I am going to function without my best friend.  What are we going to do when that guy or gal that is always by our side is suddenly hundreds of miles away? More dramatically, HOW AM I GOING TO LIVE WITHOUT THEM?! This is a serious matter, guys…

4. Our past –

It’s fun and sometime’s awful, to look back on. But when we really get down to it…it really baffles us. There are three general categories the go towards these thoughts and they are determined by how far we go back in time:

“Did we do that crap when we were freshmen?” while observing the new freshmen’s daily habit or act and reminiscing the beginning of high school.
What was I thinking?” That’s when looking back from middle school, a pretty treacherous moment in time.
And “I remember this and miss it so much!” pertaining to elementary years and below.

While we should be concentrating on our futures, our pasts are such much easier to cope with (well, not middle school) and are much more enjoyable to think about. Futures consist of not-knowing, and that’s a fear we’ll all have to overcome…in the future (see what I did there?). Yes, we are afraid. Of course, we are. But rather than making us show that, just allow us to remember…we’ve got the time for it now.

5. Finishing the year strong (and HAPPY) –

What is a senior year without one to remember? To me, this is our last year to shine. Our last year as one, our last year to laugh with those we grew up with, and our last year to be remembered. This isn’t “senior-itis”—a common phrase to pardon wild laziness and slack. This is “Hey, this is my last year here and I want to make the best of it! I’m almost at the end, so what can I do to make it last?”

And then, we seniors, proceed to find that something…whether it be trading a fun party for having to write an essay the day before it’s due or staying up all night for that great attentiveness in class the next morning. At this point in time, the last thing we truly want to think about is that worksheet due tomorrow or the lecture we’re getting in the morning. Although this thought may hinder us at times, it’s still there.

As a senior, I think we deserve a little break. With the amount of stress on our shoulders and our lives beginning in just a few months, I think we deserve a bit of peace. We’re tired of answering questions about where are lives are going after high school. To be honest, no one really knows the answer to do. Not even when you’re in your mid-40’s, nonetheless now. We hate to be asked “what do you plan on doing next year?” or the infamous, “where are you going to college?” We dunno…

So ask us about food, about graduation, about our relationships, about our past, or about how we’re making this year the best of it. We’re trying our hardest to figure those other questions within ourselves right now, the last thing we really want is trying to explain that to someone else. I guarantee that the other five topics will bring a much more enthusiastic response at the moment.

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